I Want to Know Christ

. . . that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead. - Philippians 3:10-11 [ESV]

That I may know him, Paul says.

That is hard to hear. Especially the way that the NIV says it "I want to know Christ . . ." If Paul is going to say that, what hope have I got? I was not converted by a blazing white hot presence of God. I have never been caught up to the third heaven so that I could learn dirrectly from Christ. He's not talked to me and told me that there are people he owns in any given city. These are things that have not happened to me, but they are things that did happen to Paul, so if he feels like he needs to get to know him, what hope have I got?

But of course, what Paul means is not that he wants to know about Christ, but that he wants to know him through the experience of a growing spirituality. He wants to join Christ in a life of willingness to suffer and expectation that God will let him experience that. He wants to become like Jesus, not in his life or in his glory, but to have the kind of character about him that Jesus had while dying. In this is his hope for new life.

I can have that. I want to have that. I can have a spiritual life that is always growing, ever closer to Christ, daily more open to Him. By his power and help I can adopt a posture that cares less about what I want, less about my comfort and more about a willingness to give my life up - even to suffer pain and sorrow. I can grow to love as Jesus loved while dying - to pray for those who hurt me.

I want to know Christ.